TNPC Home | ParenTalk | Articles - Preteen | Parent Chat

Toy Guide

by Evelyn Petersen

When we look at the amount of toys in the stores it is truly staggering! There are so many choices that its easy to feel overwhelmed. Here are a few guidelines to keep your head on straight.

Give children gifts that reflect the values you hope they will learn. The toys and gifts we give children teach them our values. When adults give children books they are sending clear messages that written words are enjoyable and valuable. When we give children crafts, we are saying that creating something with your own hands is important. When we give them computer games we are teaching them to value technology.

When we give children family games, we are saying that spending time together as a family is important. When children receive sports equipment, they know we value active play and sports. When we give them toys and games that teach them to feel powerful or to diminish others, we may be teaching them to value aggression and violence.

Minimize gift choices of battery operated toys. Instead, emphasize open ended materials and toys that increase thinking and creative skills. Gifts such as Legos, blocks, Lincoln Logs, Tinker Toys, art materials, and dress ups or props are toys that "grow" with the child. Since the materials can be used an any manner, they are "failure proof;" any age child can use them with joy and success.

Make non sexist choices. Remember to consider the interests of the particular child, regardless of gender. Both girls and boys like stuffed animals and craft items; girls love hot wheels cars and blocks as much as boys do.

Take the ages listed on the product with a grain of salt. Ages listed are approximate, and a year may be added on each end. Parents will know what children can do or not do. If a toy is "too hard"' save it a while.

Don't let ads, promotions or family pressure to sway your decisions. Know your budget and stick to it. List gift ideas before you shop to avoid impulse buying. If money is short, tell family members and children about it. Knowing about the reality of financial restrictions is a life skill children need to learn.

Don't try to give children everything they want. Children need to learn delayed gratification...that they can't have anything they want when they want it. When parents or relatives give, give give, children just learn "gimme, gimme, gimme," not gratitude or appreciation. Happy shopping!

Ms. Petersen's nationally syndicated parenting column is carried in over 200 newspapers twice each week. As a family/parenting consultant, early childhood educator, Head Start consultant, and host of a series of parent training audio and video tapes, Ms. Petersen employs an approach of providing hands-on, nuts and bolts advice to parents across the country. Her new book "A Practical Guide to Early Childhood Planning: The What Why and How of Lesson Plans" has just been released.

TNPC Home | ParenTalk | Articles about Preteens | Comments for TNPC

Programmed by: http://www.parentsplace.com/